"Strange things are afoot at the Circle K"

Edwin - who is also afraid of cameras

   Aster (my cat) thinks she is on the verge of death.  She made this quite clear a few minutes ago when, in an attempt to inform me of this horrible news, she knocked a lamp off of the mantle.  This, in turn, sent Edwin (my dog) skyrocketing up the stairs.
   I am a bad mother.  Aster would certainly tell you so:  I come home from work.  I ignore her cries.  I sit down to check out facebook, my email and various other virtual interests while her bowl sits empty.  Edwin, I am sure would agree - although for very different reasons:  I leave him.  I do not do anything about the wind or rain.  My phone makes noise.  I let men into the house.
   The last couple of weeks have been a challenge for me.  And when I say challenge, I mean more of a challenge than usual.  Shortly before I turned forty, I started to quietly unravel.  It's been six months since that fateful day.  I have not come completely undone...yet.  Actually, I am experiencing a shift in perspective not a true unraveling.  Unraveling sounds like I am losing my mind.  While I am sure there are a few who would say I have already lost it, I feel I am quite sane.  Although, the way I see things and what I want are changing.  I am sure this has been a challenge for my furry family.  They are truly creatures of habit and changes in routine are way scary.  Times like these make me think of "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure"...."Strange things are afoot at the Circle K."
   This week, I had a dream about the end of the world as we know it ( and I did not feel fine).  I was a part of a world in which almost everyone was controlled by a "big brother" type of character.  And, everyone was wearing white.  In the dream, I was a member of the resistance.  This seemed like the only choice since A: I don't like being controlled, and B: I do not look good in white.  It was a very frightening dream and has been living near the surface all week.
   A few other unusual things have happened in the past few weeks that have made me even more uneasy than normal.  I am not going to detail them here and now.  But, I will spend a little time on possible cures.  Tonight, it was chicken fingers, onion rings, french fries, conversation with my girls, a vodka cocktail, and Arcade Fire's "Ready to Start" (which is on a loop in my head).  Tomorrow, it will be "Harry Potter".  During the weekend, it will be rest, leaf raking, making a salty caramel apple pie, dinner with a friend I rarely see, and vodka cocktails.  Oh, that makes me sound like a lush.  And I just don't care. 

  
Ready to Start